Apple Can Suck My Balls

Here we are ACSMB fans, the next installment of the ‘Building a Mac Killer’ series. Today, we’ll examine the actual cost that an individual might expect to pay when purchasing each component in an iMac.

Let’s start with the base model iMac, that Apple sells for $1199:

While a bit weak by current standards, that’s not too bad of a system right there. Certainly enough for someone who just wants to surf the internet, play an older game or two, etc. Now let’s take a look at a price list for comparable system components at NewEgg.com, a popular site for system builders.

As you can see, it’s a system that pretty much identical in hardware specs to the iMac listed above, with a few exceptions:

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Wooohooo! The reports just keep pouring in…the Operating System of Jesus himself, OSX.5 aka ‘Leopard’ is causing thousands of Mac’s to brick with a BSOD. That means ‘Blue Screen of Death’ to any of you who don’t know. This can happen to a PC too, although on a PC that death screen will dump information that can help solve the problem. Since Apple thinks all its users are stupid, you’re left hanging when Leopard shitcans your expensive little toy…

I guess I’ll see you at the genius bar, huh my little Appleoids? LOL…check it out:

A significant number of Mac owners upgrading to Leopard on Friday reported that after installing the new operating system, their machines locked up, showing only an interminable — and very Windows-like — “blue screen of death.”

Easily the heaviest-trafficked thread on the Leopard support forums as of late Friday, “Installation appears stuck on a plain blue screen” told how after a successful Leopard install using the default “Upgrade” option and the required restart, some users’ Macs refused to budge from the blue screen. Although many gave up after 30-60 minutes and rebooted, others were more patient and let their Macs be as long as six hours.

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Have any annoying Macazoid friends who picked up one of these shirts at the Leopard release party?

Doesn’t that piss you off? Not only that you’re friends with such a nerd, but that Apple would deface such a great movie by stealing the tagline and applying their own nauseating schtick to it?

Well, now you can fight back!

Introducing, the ACSMB.com Leopard release party t-shirts!

Check it freaks:

Awwww yea! Now that’s some style right there. Click the shirt to go right to the ACSMB store!!

Which brings me to my next topic:

Ah yes, it had to come…Leopard gets released, we have a new T-shirt…it’s time for a contest!! Yes!!
Get your pic taken with one of those shirts on, and send it to us via email:

Do something crazy! Trick or treating, standing on your head, whateva…let your hate for Apple guide you on your photographic quest. Best 5 will get reviewed by our panel and will get featured on the site!!

First person to send a pic of them with an ACSMB shirt on IN AN APPLE STORE gets $25.00. No foolin! (so you get the shirt for free + money for coffee:)) That would be so damn funny, it’s worth way more…but hey it’s not like I’m Apple and have a ton of money from charging people
$170 $129 for what should be a free OS upgrade

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I’m sure some of you are aware of BlogRush , the purported ‘traffic generator’ for weblogs. As I’m sure you can tell, ACSMB received a much-needed update last night and I figured I’d attempt to install a BlogRush javascript thing in an attempt to drive more traffic to this fine site. I am, after all, primarily concerned with bringing the truth to the masses, and enlightening the unenlightenable.

Well, after submitting all the necessary crap, here’s what I received in response:

Your Blog Was Not Approved For Our Network
This message is to inform you that we have carefully reviewed your blog:

Apple Can Suck My Balls

http://apple.cansuckmyballs.com

Your blog did not meet our strict quality criteria.

Therefore, your blog has not been approved for use in our network.

Please do not take this decision personally. We have decided to only approve the highest quality blogs for our network.

Please remove the BlogRush code from your blog’s pages.

Our Quality Guidelines and criteria are listed within our Terms Of Service agreement: http://www.blogrush.com/terms

If you improve the quality of your blog, and you feel that it then meets our strict criteria, you can try and resubmit your blog for review after 30 days — anytime on or after this date:

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Thank you for your interest in BlogRush.

Best Regards,

The BlogRush Team

Awwww….what was it? That great big ‘Balls’ word I have in the banner? Or maybe that I’m spitting anti-Apple Haterade like a perpetual fountain of electronic authenticity? Do balls make you nervous BlogRush? Does the mere mention of that part of the male anatomy cause you to shiver in your wal-mart discount shoes? Or maybe the words ‘Balls’ and ‘Apple’ in the same sentance remind you of a adolescent fantasy gone horribly awry? Because you’ve rejected me BlogRush, I guess I’ll never know.

Ah, Im just kidding Blogrush…but you still suck ass.

May the ashes of your pathetic internet startup darken the skies of the blogosphere with a weight that is only matched by the gravity of your failure.