A New Language

Because I hate Apple, and Apple Freak-Jerk-Wankers, so much, I’ve decided to invent my own language whose sole purpose is to spew negativity about the Apple brand through any means possible.

Just like native Eskimos have many different words to describe snow, I think that my language should have many different ways to describe how much Apple Sucks.

What’s funny is, I know a few hundred people visit this site everyday,and many of you are mac fans. Does this offend you? Does it? Well guess what, fuck you and your stupid, crappy, lame, overpriced piece of shit computers.

And your 3G iPhone too, you freakin’ wankers!

Anyway, without much further adieu, here’s our first word:

Sapendogphil – \SAH-pendog-PHIL\, noun
A macfreak who is sexually attracted to canines and Dr.Phil, but only on Wednesdays; A dog screwing, Dr.Phil watching mac user who waits in line for every new piece of crap Apple pukes out of Cupertino.

“Oh geez, its Wednesday and that sapendogphil is at it again. Poor kid, when will he learn that lusting after dogs and watching Dr.Phil on his Macbook just isnt cool”

“Oh my god!! What are you doing to the dog?? Why is Dr.Phil on TV??? You make me sick you sapendogphil!!! Im getting a divorce!”

“You see that sapendogphil over there? Watching dog porn at Starbucks on his mac…I guarantee there’s a Dr.Phil self-help book in his breifcase”


Keep the words coming people!! ACSMB is going to put out a dictionary by the end of summer…we’ll get this stuff into Webster’s and then its free ACSMB T-shirts for everyone!!

2 Responses to “A New Language”

  1. How about “Jobbers”?

    To describe Apple Fan Boys that go out and buy the newest Apple product because Steve “Hand” Jobs decides it’s time to take more money from them. Like with the last iphone 3g.

    Their gen 1 is working fine, but now they have to get 3g so they CAN’T (yup, it still doens’t support Flash. What’s the 3G actually for again?) view Flash content on their new overpriced toy. OR maybe they need the new, but unimproved (and actually crippled) GPS! So Mac people know where they are when they are being total Sapendogphils. lol. They won’t be able to find their way there… it’s not turn based.. but once they are there, they sure will know it.

    Maybe MacJobber? or iDooshes? Something along those lines…

  2. I think you’ll enjoy this too. I should have added this to the reply post.